An Interview With The Doof Warrior
by settlechaos
Summary: A series of three interviews from The Radiated Stone magazine showing the rise, fall, and come back of the crimson pajama wearing rock star named Doof Warrior. Read and learn about his music inspirations and how the Immortan Joe transformed his music career turning him into the most famous music icon in the desert wasteland of the Mad Max universe.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

Excerpt from Radiated Stone magazine

In this day and age it may feel like music has nothing new to offer anymore. Many young men have stopped pursue the art of music and have focused their efforts on car modifications and ritualistic suicide. As a result music has become nothing more than pounding of war drums and chanting. That is until now. Watch out and open your ears, because there is new superstar that has emerged with new sound that is really an old sound. With his electric guitar jams he reminds of me of period that was a renaissance of where everyone was trying something new create a new sound and reinvent rock n roll. A time when all sorts of rock n rollers where becoming overnight successes only to burn out the next day. Although what sets this artist from the others of the time he has made a statement that he is here to stay. His first album debut at the top of the charts at the last Emmys he took home all of the awards*. I am of course talking about the crimson pajamas rocker Doof Warrior.

*All the other nominees at the awards show where murdered by Immortan Joe.

-Radiated Stone: Doof Warrior thank you for taking time away from your desert outback tour to talk with me. This is big honor to be interviewing you.

-Doof Warrior: You're welcome; you know it's an honor for me too. I have been a fan of you magazine ever since I was a little war boy. Whenever a new issue would come out I would read it from front to back and when I was teenager it was my dream to someday be on the cover. Now that the dream has become real I can hardly believe it's happening. I've been screaming in the faces of all of my family and they couldn't be anymore happy about it. As the matter of fact my mother has had the cover frame up on her wall right above the ammo cache in her room.

-RS: You and your mother are really close aren't you?

-DW: Yes, very much so. I love her. You know that song "Massive Milk Machine"? I wrote that about her. You should have seen her when she first heard that song. She cried, well figuratively I mean, because she doesn't have tear ducts, but I could tell looking at her that she wanted to cry and not just because the sandstorm that was blowing in her face. (pause) Ah, I really do love her. It's just that she really means so much to me you know. I love all of my family equally, but it's like my father, brother, and grandfather, they are all the same person, and I'm my own brother. Were as my mother is she is, you know, just my mother and that's something special. I can't say that for anyone else in my family not even my sister who is also my aunt and wife.

-RS: So it is official you and your sister did tie the knot? No more single life for you.

-DW: Well thanks to Immortan Joe polygamy is now legal I can still screw who ever I want.

-RS: That's right no one can keep Doof Warrior tied down.

-DW: (laugh) That's right I be getting so much booty that I've been considering changing my stage name to LL Doof W.

-RS: Yeah, That Immortan Joe is an amazing leader. How does it feel to know that the most powerful leader in the known world is a fan of you?

-DW: it's an amazing honor. I can't even describe it. To have a fan that famous and powerful seems so unreal, you know what I mean. It's like I'm just one guy strumming and he likes me? What? A God among men. Like how is that fair? I should be worshipping him. Don't get me wrong I would die for Immortan Joe, but for example last month I was scheduled to perform at concert in Gas Town. It was supposed to be a sold out show, but when I came out on stage the crowd dead. Literally, I mean everyone was dead, except for Immortan Joe was there. Apparently he showed up fifteen minutes earlier without a ticket and they would let him in and he killed everyone in attendance just so that he can have a front row seat to the show.

-RS: (laughs) Well better make sure you have a ticket for him at the next show.

-DW: That's right, but actually he really is nice guy. He once attended one my after parties and brought of a keg of that water stuff or as he calls it aquacola. I don't know if you have ever had the stuff, but it is amazing, so crisp and clear. He wouldn't let me have too much. He said it can be addictive. After one sip I could see why. It's so refreshing and energizing and afterwards I felt so thirsty, but you've got to control your high. You know what I'm saying.

-RS: That is amazing you released your debut album last year and already you are rubbing elbows with creme de la crème. How does it feel to be overnight success?

-DW: I don't know what you are talking about. I'm not overnight success. I worked hard for this. I would practice my guitar every day until had blisters on my fingers and then I would perform at hole in rocks bars. Sometimes no one would show up, the only crowd would be two head lizards, but I kept at it. I strived and continued to perform, because I music is my life. The music it runs through my veins.

-RS: That very inspirational. Where do you find inspiration for your songs?

-DW: Well I find inspiration in life and everything around me. I listen to the world around me. I pay attention to the desert sand, the clouds in the sky, and the screams of the raiders. I let it all speak to me so that I can give them a voice and tell their story through my music.

-RS: Lately you've been spending a lot of time away from home on the road. Do you ever find yourself feeling homesick?

-DW: Well lately I've been bring my mother along with me while on tour. She loves it. Well not so much the concerts, they are too loud and bloody for her. Although she loves the tour bus that we have and the roadies are really nice to her.

-RS: I have one more question for you before we have to call an end to this. Now I've wondering why the red pajamas?

-DW: (laughs) Why? That's asking why you need big tires on your car. Why carve a V8 engine into your chest? Why do sand storms include thunder and twisters? Because I can. That's why, because I can.

-RS: Spoken like a true poet. Thank you for joining us Doof Warrior. I hope to speak to you again real soon.

-DW: Thank you for having me.


	2. Chapter 2

Three months later

-Radiated Stone: Doof Warrior, it's so great to be interviewing you again. How are you doing?

-Doof Warrior: -Cough- Cough-

-RS: Uh are you okay?

-Doof Warrior: -Hack- Cough- Cough-Weeze- Water… I need… -Cough-Cough- water…

-RS: Can we get some water?

(Assistant brings water and Doof Warrior swallows the whole glass in one gulp)

-RS: Whoa, pace yourself, you don't want to make yourself sick.

-DW: More.

-RS: Water? Sorry we can't spare much with all of the rationing.

-DW (yells): More!

-RS: Calm down, maybe we can get you some milk.

-DW: Get me more water –Cough-Cough- Or I will fu-Cough-Cough-

(Assistant brings more water)

-RS: Well um… Well it's safe to say that your life has gone through some big changes recently.

-DF: Can we make this quick? Immorten Joe is going to be pillaging and raping a few communes later and he needs me to play on the war truck.-Cough-Cough-

-RS: Are you okay? You seem a little sick.

-DF: I'm strapped to the top of a truck. Driving through the hot desert with sand pelting me face and giant loud speakers assaulting me eardrums and they never pull over to let me pee! (Yelling) And you are asking if I'm okay? Do I seem okay to you?!

-RS: Wow, well uh look at the bright side you now have a badass metal electric guitar that shoots fire. That's pretty cool right?

-DF: I've got third degree burns up and down my arms. Does that sound pretty cool to you?

-RS: Well um how about you new look. The mask looks awesome.

-DF: It's my mother's face.

-RS: Okay, moving on…

-DF: Two months ago my tour bus was attacked by crazed lunatics and my mother was raped and killed in front of me. I too was horribly beaten and left for dead, but I was rescued by Immortan Joe and I now wear my mother's face in her honor.

-RS: Yeah, like I said moving on. Being Immortan Joe's personal musician must be a well-paying job. What are some the perks that you get?

-DF: Perks? I don't get any perks. The only thing I get in return for my performances in a dead rat every night. I am sick of that butthole! If he was here right now-

(Suddenly a large hole was smashed in the wall and Immortan Joe and few of war boys drove their hot rods in to the studio)

-Immortan Joe: Doof Warrior! There you are, come on strap yourself to the truck. I need to go out to get some milk from the store.

-RS: Well bye then, I guess. I was nice getting to interview again.

(Doof Warrior leaves with Immortan Joe and his war boys)

-RS: (to assistant) Well that was a complete disaster. What is with these rock stars and their devil may care attitude?


End file.
